Becoming Who We Really Are: The Journey of Being Human

We are always becoming. From the day we were born, and really before that—we embarked on a journey of becoming. We do not stay who we were and we will not remain who we are at this very moment.Who of us would ever want to remain our 6 year old self? Is there anyone who wants to go back and remain 13 for ever?We morph. We change. We grow. We transform. This is the story of our lives.Take a look at me and my grandson, Charlie. He’s just six months old in this picture. Every parent knows that the terrible two’s are coming. But that doesn't matter to me. I'm his grandfather--his Pappy.He’ll go through adolescence; go through puberty; challenge his parents, go to school; get a few jobs, date a few girls and marry someone when he’s ready. He will try on vocational clothes—trying on one job, another role—yet another position until he, at lasts can say, “For this—I was made.” It will be a journey.  Sometimes, we seem to lose sight of the fact of our formation. As Charlie's Pappy, I consider it to be my chef--role to help him know his story and claim his story and live out of his story. I don't have to raise him. But I do want to help him understand his story.Then, there is Charlie’s spiritual journey. A person's spiritual story is really EVERY chapter of their life-story: health, past, relationships, vocational journey, fears, dreams, failures, sin, glory and more. Charlie, like all of us has a spiritual story—a sort of flowing and winding road where he will learn about God. He will hear about his original glory—that deep place within his soul that is all good and full of light. I honestly believe that the most important role of a grandparent is to re-enforce the original glory into our grandchildren. I say this because the parents are so consumed, like we all were, with survival, diapers, driving the kids around and discipline. He will be told about his sin—Lord knows, so much emphasis is on that part of his story that most of us have never even considered our original glory. Before there was sin, remember--there was glory.  He will be shaped by love, hurt, rejection, passion, longings and failure. All of it will shape his little soul that you see today.Charlie, like everyone of us, will be soul shaped by geography and place, good people and hurtful people. He will encounter mystery, facts and figures and be drawn to one or more of those shaping realities.  He will have his own distinct dreams and longings separate from his father and mother and his grandparents. He will make his own choices—some good and some not so good that will all shape his soul.Gifted writer, Madeline L’Engle pens these true words for us:“I am still every age that I have been. Because I was once a child, I am always a child. Because I was once a searching adolescent, given to moods and ecstasies, these are still part of me, and always will be... This does not mean that I ought to be trapped or enclosed in any of these ages...the delayed adolescent, the childish adult, but that they are in me to be drawn on; to forget is a form of suicide... Far too many people misunderstand what *putting away childish things* means, and think that forgetting what it is like to think and feel and touch and smell and taste and see and hear like a three-year-old or a thirteen-year-old or a twenty-three-year-old means being grownup.And Spiritual author and mentor, David Benner writes, “Identifying and embracing your lineage is an important part of any pathway to greater wholeness because it involves remembering your own story. All the parts of your journey must be woven together if you are to transcend your present organization and level of consciousness. For myself, the great challenge was re-embracing traditions that I have grown beyond and that offered—even at the time—an oppressively small worldview. I did not want to be an ex-evangelical or an ex-fundamentalist. Too many people live that life of dis-identification, and I did not want to share their anger and “stuckness.” It was essential, therefore, for me to identify and embrace the gifts that had come to me from these traditions. This was the way in which I came to know that everything in my life belongs, that every part of my story has made important contributions to who I am. And the same is true for you.Charlie will have chapters of his life that he will have to make sense of. Each of us have chapters—some we like and some we don’t. There are sad chapters of failed marriages, broken relationships and following our prodigal hearts.  But what sense can we make of these shattered pieces of our story--these illusions that are so hard to die in us?When I look back at some of my chapters, I’ve noticed that as I’ve “moved on” or “moved through” a particular season or chapter, I had no real way of integrating THAT particular chapter into my story or soul.  At times, I felt like I was shedding old snake skins so that something new could come out.  I felt the need to "get rid" of the old skins rather than embrace them.  How about you?For many years now, I have called myself an “Re-Covering Baptist.” That always gets a good laugh in most circles I speak in except when I am among the Baptist themselves.   But truthfully, there were things—boxy things; narrow things, and some things I could never quite figure out that all seems to be informing me, “This is not you, Steve.” “This is not who you are. Pay attention.”  I'm wondering if in my telling you this about me, what might stir inside of you?  What or who are you "re-covering" from?Some of us will be recovering from some thing; some group; some political affiliation, some denomination or some person. Some of us will have addiction in our story—a lot of us. Some of us will have abuse. Some of us will discover we were abused not by what was “done” to us but by what was not given us—that every human being created in the imago Die deserves, requires and needs to be whole and healthy.I have heard the stories of thousands of souls—and the stories that bother and confound me the most are those that go like this:-I don’t have a past.-My past was buried and all I have is a present and a future.This past Saturday, I took a long drive and came upon a church with a big sign which read, “No one has a past—only a future.” I sat in the parking lot so disturbed by that sign that I had a quiet protest with my coffee, then drove on.What a lie—to say “no one has a past.” Here’s the deal. Charlie is living his past every single day right now.  And so are you.  So am I.So much truth and so much light is in our past that it’s really shocking. Our challenge is that so many of us don’t really know our story. We say, “We can’t remember.” Or, “That was so long ago, I’ve forgotten it.” I doubt it. The mind stores up all of these gold memories for us to mine and find the nuggets of gold that will enrich our lives.  Gwen and I have been working with a gifted therapist who is trained in helping us unlock the memories we can't dredge up--but have "bothered us". It's been such a helpful investment--particularly in our marriage. We felt the need to finally unlock the door of  each of our past that had gone unexplored and unexamined. We did this because we were hitting some impasses--all about our individual formation stories. It felt like our individual "past" stories were colliding and creating friction.  After 37 years, we felt like it was time to dig in and see what was "there".  We are both enjoying the fruits right now of such work--more peace and contentment than ever in our marriage.The apostle Paul reminds us, “We see through a glass dimly but one day, we will see face to face.” I think there’s far, far, far more to that verse than we can ever quite imagine. Our stories and Charlie’s story is already dim. We just don’t quite get or understand the power of people who shape our souls. We have not had enough science to reveal how our memories—our traumas—our beautiful experiences make us who we are.As I review my own story from time to time, I am realizing the power and significance of the shaping experiences of having a dramatic conversation on January 21, 1972 in my university chapel. Later, I was deeply shaped by flaming charismatic friends and one amazing Lutheran Pastor (Herb Mirley) who helped me break out of my boxes and experience an inner life where Jesus lives. Having a creed was not enough for me. I wanted it all. These friends helped me speak in what I though was “tongues”—but gave up after feeling like I forcing "it" to convince my friends, “I had it.” I was discipled diligently for four years by an Inter-Varsity staff worker who singled me out and poured massive time, books and memorizing Scripture into my soul. Some of what he "taught" me, I know now is wrong and not correct. I tried then to make a break from my denominational roots but did not have the courage to do so, so settled in for twenty years until I could find the words and muster the courage to say, “This is not me.”Like Benner, I am learning to embrace all of my chapters—all of my story into one, whole and integrated story that has shaped me.  It feels as close to what David wrote when he prayed, "Give me an undivided heart, that I might praise your name." For many years, my heart has been divided by doctrine, boxed by fears and marshaled by an energy that now I see was man made--not God shaped.Even now, I am still becoming. I am not done. There are still some things I need to lay aside in order to grasp hold of what is ahead of me. Some labels don’t fit me anymore and I want to grow in my gratitude for these chapters rather than be held hostage by them. I want to thank the Lord for the good I got wearing the label and courageously be willing to keep moving forward.How would you tell your story?  Who knows your story?  It would be a good goal in the the year ahead and find some trusted, safe and loving friends to listen to your story--and you listen to their story. Here are six suggestions:

1. Use my book Soul Shaping to explore your past shaping events and people.
2. Read or re-read my book The Lazarus LIfe where I tell me story through the story of Lazarus. You'll be given language and vocabulary to dig into your own story. There's a work book also for more and deeper work.
3. Develop a time line in five year increments where you note the people, places, events and internal awakenings you experienced including abuse, trauma and rich and wonderful events.
4. Make a time with 2-5 friends and give each person one hour to tell their story uninterrupted and unedited.
5. Be kind to yourself as you dig into your story. Most stories have chapters and novels of guilt and shame. See if you can find the light and grace in each chapter of your story—for God has been with you all along, just has it is with Charlie right now.
6. Ask God to help you remember and consider sitting with someone gracious, non-judging and who can deeply listen to your story.

The Illusions of Christmas

If there ever was a time when our hearts are gripped with illusions—this is it! An illusion is some ideal that snags our hearts. It’s what we dream of—it’s not what really is.

We may dream of having a “White Christmas” or happy family time and then we discover that what we’re experiencing is more like hell on earth.

Christmas is filled with a strange assortment of myth and truth. The bright lights and sugar coated candy canes confuse us to what may be a long, bleak journey into a winter season of our lives.

A couple of years ago, we traveled “home” to North Carolina with visions of sugar plums lodged in our head. When we arrived at home, we stayed in a “staged home that was for sale.” It was empty of warmth and decor. Our families were so busy. Our friends were already booked up. It seemed like we were on our own, even though we were suppose to be with loved ones. That trip didn't work. It was crammed full with illusions. It wasn’t what we had in mind when we booked out plane tickets and made our reservations. But it was what it was.

One of  the most freeing and liberating exercises we can undertake is learning how to dissect our illusions and sort out what is myth and what is truth.  After all, it is the truth that sets us free—not illusions and certainly not myths.Here’s what is true:  God saw us all in our long, bleak spiritual winters. He sent his only Son, born of a virgin to be a stellar sign that something was up and that we need to pay attention.  What was up was simply this: God was now made flesh and it all converged in the baby, Jesus.

What we celebrate and that is worthy of celebration is the truth. Not illusions.Christmas may not be what you really want it to be—for what you’re hoping for may just be illusions.  But the truth of Christmas is something to light a candle for and sit in some quiet to yet, again receive the Christ child in our midst and sigh, “Silent Night, Holy Night.”

May your heart be calmed by the truth and may all of our illusions fall apart in the New Year. May we find ourselves grounded in the truth of God’s love and compassion for each one of us.

And with this, I say, Merry Christmas to all of our friends, family and supporters!

Re-Thinking Our Capacity

 There is an ever growing thinness to the souls of people I encounter.  Besides the fact that we are busy, over-committed and manage rivaling priorities, is this fitting diagnosis:  we’re tired, worn out; teeter tottering on burn out; always recovering from some one, some thing or some event. There’s never enough margin to make like work as we secretly think it should. We have resigned our lives to attempting to survive successfully—whatever that means. To survive successfully seems to be enough admist the ever present voices that we will all have to do more to barely survive and we can forget about thriving. The word, "thriving" can go the way of the dinosaur, VHS tape and family dinners.Underneath our malaise is a gnawing sense of never feeling as if we have enough capacity. We are made to feel in most situations we find ourselves—be it church, work, community involvement, raising children, caring for aging parents and in marriage that we need to be doing more.So from an early age until this very moment we find ourselves on a hunt for more and doing more while neglecting a deeper, more soulful discussion about our understanding of capacity.Organizations, business, churches and non-profits seem to categorize us into silos where we are rated according to our abilities, performance and aptitude. Some of us are told we are “high capacity” leaders. While others are “mid-level.” Some have given us colors, symbols or animals to understand our place in the order of things. We are the color: orange, assigned a number like “5” to help us aspire to become a 7 or another number we are told is better than the one we are at present. We could be a roaring lion or an playful otter. But it doesn’t matter what color you are or what animal others perceive you to be if you’re always left with a suspicion that to move up; we must always be doing more. To do more and be more becomes the stressful cadence of how we do our everyday lives. And in the living of our over-committed lives, our humanity leaks from us as air from a red ballon with a  slow, steady leak. One of the reasons that we leak so much is that we have not understood our capacity.When we begin to re-think our capacity, we find a new and life-giving platform upon which we can stand; build our lives and live with a sense of inner satisfaction marked by words such as peace, joy and well-being.Re-thinking our capacity involves several aspects of re-thinking our lives and how we see other people. It's not just about how much MORE work can we do? It's about being human and keeping our humanity in tact so we do not morph into working machines giving off fumes of burned out oil in the already polluted world we are living in at this moment.

• Understanding our limits. If we adopt the idea that our calendars do not need to dictate our capacity we will then begin to understand our limits and our capacity. To live well means that we need space between our meetings, conferences, presentations and sessions to reflect, ponder and gain the meaning we can for ourselves. We are not helping machines. But we can become shaped to feel as if we are a mere cog in the wheel when we do not learn to schedule space between our meetings, intense conversations and crammed schedules. I blogged about understanding our limits earlier and discussed it in my book, INSIDE JOB.
• Be present with who are you are present with. When we are emotionally distant and vacant, we may have left the building and the room in which we are meeting someone--perhaps someone very important to us. Our body is there but are hearts are somewhere else.  I explored having a father who was emotionally distant from me at breakfast in my childhood in THE LAZARUS LIFE. We shared cereal together but not much else. I coined the phrase, "the cereal stare" to give words to that terrible gap between our chairs at the table and our hearts inside. Capacity means having the ability to be present—to be engage—to be focused with one’s heart and attention. When we are over our capacity, we see people like things and conversations like work. We can work, live and make love in a trance while missing out on the real, live encounter with the person who is sitting across from us or lying next to us in bed. To be present means being available—all of us being available to the person we are working with, engaged in a meaningful relationship or caring for in some degree.
• Being Aware. When I book meetings close together; when I meet back-to-back to make “more happen” than it probably should, I lose my awareness of what I’m doing in the meeting and lose my perspective on who it is I’m actually talking with. Being aware requires taking a few moments to breath; to think and pray, “God let me be aware of what is about to happen. Keep me in sync with my own heart, reactions, gifts and ability to love this person.” To lose sight of who it is we are with is to lose the capacity to be real, authentic and to be fully human. We lose our humanity when we try to do more and more with less and less time. Our losing our humanity begins with losing our own awareness of ourselves and the dignity each human being offers us in any kind of meeting or situation we find ourselves. In short, our availability does not equal our capacity. We may give someone the time they are asking for but we are not really there with them. Our body may be present but our mind is off in a distant, far off land and we are offering them a shell of ourselves. We all have old ways, patterns and addictions about the nicks, wounds and bruises of sharing life with someone who was not present or aware. But there is recovery for all of us and all recover begins with this first step: being aware of my real condition and the real people around me.
• Extending Hospitality. Extending hospitality is as simple as taking the time to really see they person coming to you for what they really are: a seeker; a person trying to make life work as we are as well; and that every person who we meet with is really the invitation to experience the Presence of God in them. Years ago, I went to meet a famous monk who I had gotten to know through his writings. I was so intent on meeting him and what I would say, that when I went to the monastery, I didn’t even realize it was the monk who I wanted to meet that actually opened the door for me to enter the monastery. He greeted me so warmly; embraced me and offered me a refreshment. All the while I was wondering how it could be that I would meet the famous Monk—Richard Rohr. When I asked in the bookstore if I could meet him, another brother- monk smiled and said, “You already met him. That was Father Rohr who greeted you at the door.” I was embarrassed and ashamed. When we are so intent on doing our work; accomplishing our tasks and checking off our lists, we can miss Someone in everyone. Extending hospitality is one of pillars of some businesses and ministries; while others are consumed with services, events and the next thing. We think of hospitality in the wrong way when we think of dinner parties and entertaining. Extending the incarnational love of God through our own presence and reactions to others is true care and true love.

 Our capacity is more than what we can ascertain in books and seminars about doing more and moving from being good to great. Our capacity is learning what it means to be human; to recover our humanity in a rat-race world marked with moving ladders of success and accomplishment.Our capacity is found in re-thinking what kind of people we have become and reclaiming a notion of the kind of people we want to become.

More Waiting

This morning, I got up early. Way before the sun came up. We've been travelling through time zones and I'm still not adjusted.  But maybe it was something more. I suspect my getting up early had something more to do with more waiting.Gwen and I read together this verse and sat with it for a few moments:  "My soul waits for the Lord my would waits in his word I put my hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than watchment wait for the morning, more than watch wait for the morning."  (Ps. 130:5-6).  We sat and waited for the sun to rise, casting its sacred rays upon Pikes Peak which we can see outside our living room. We waited. Paused. Lingered and then talked a bit.We were struck at how much wating is going on.  Two friends diagnosed with what may well be terminal cancer unless there is divine intervention--await that single, intervention which could change everything.One couple friend waits and waits for a job to open. Any job. He's even applied at Home Depot, though he has a Masters. They wait.We are waiting also with some of the news and developments happening in our sons and daughters lives. Now, Jordan is home on  his 2 week leave from Iraq and his days of waiting for that leave for 8 long, hot months are over but his days of waiting to return to Iraq are quickly coming--to quick.We wait for our third son, Cameron who just moved to Germany to begin his life at his new miliary assignment. He's waiting on a place to live; waiting on internet so he can be FINALLY connected; waiting on meeting people.Our other 2 sons are waiting on big developments for their jobs and future.And we are waiting on God's provision for us to take another step forward in the progression on our "inn"--the big, red barn. God's provided $5,800--the exact amount due to pay the guy putting in the insulation. But we will have to wait more on more funds to do the sheetrock. Because we do not have enough funds to pay for the dry wall to be installed, we had to decide to cancel--perhaps postpone is a better word--the coming of a mission team from Wisconsin already planning on coming. But the sheetrock needed to be installed before they could come and do the carpentry work--the finish trim. We're that close, yet more waiting.Then, after this thinking about waiting.... we read a hymn which I will share with you in closing.  Make sure you catch the last verse. Amazing. Powerful. God's whisper to us early this morning---way before the sun came up!"God moves in a mysterious wayHis wonders to perform.He plants his footsteps in the sea,And rides upon the storm.Deep unfathomable minesOf never-failing skill.He treasures up his bright designsAnd works his sovereign will.You fearful saints fresh courage take,The clouds you so much dreadAre big with mercy and shall breakIn blessings on your heard."

Soul Care: Caring for Those in Need

When Jesus told us the familiar story of the Good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-47), he was doing more than telling us a nice story.  This story is perhaps, one of the most told stories every told and is well known by people of other faiths and traditions.This is a mandate for us to care--to really care for people.  A man is beat up on his journey by thugs and thieves. He was taken advantage of and trauma was the result.  Van Gogh paints the story for us in vivid color and by pausing we can see more than just a nice story.The injured man is left by the side of the road in peril and in need of care.  After several busy people passed this man by, an insignificant person stopped who no one would have even envisioned worthy to be able to offer the injured man care and help.  The man who stopped was a Samaritan--someone  who was not respected or well-thought of in his day.  This "good" Samaritan we're told, took the ailing and injured person to an Inn where the Innkeeper pledged all the help needed to restore the person's well-being.Look at the injured man on the horse.  His body is limp.  He's weak from the journey. His head his bandaged showing that he is most likely in a daze--even unable to dismount his horse. He's weak. He's tired. He's been through trauma.Notice the "Good" person in the story. He is the one helping the injured man. He's dressed different from the ailing man. He's strong--reaching to help the man down.  Do you see the open suitcase in the bottom left corner. The man has been robbed. Things have been taken from him. He's been violated. He's been a victim.  Right above the suitcase is one the people who noticed the injured man but is passing by. He didn't stop to help. He did not care. He was pre-occupied with his life--his mission--his goal--perhaps his own thoughts.  Learning to care involves thinking of one's self less and the needs of others more. This is what we mean when we say that someone is "selfless." We mean that their thoughts are focused on something other than self. The folks who passed this dear injured man by--were thinking of religion; thinking of their obligations; thinking of themselves and their own busyness.We learn in the parable and in the fabulous painting that caring for the soul of men and women requires a few simple acts:

• Noticing--Jesus' story is about noticing the folks around us in our every day life who need care.  Some noticed and passed by; others rushed by too pre-occupied to stop; too limited in time to really care.  Soul Care first begins in the act of noticing. Who needs help? Who in your everyday walking, talking and working life seems to be hurting?  Truly "good" people do not see others as invisible.  They have a sense that people matter and hurting people matter a lot. When we are too pre-occupied to notice the hurting--we are too busy. By moving fast and by moving with great intention, we overlook someone who is need. Isn't this the real message Jesus offered us in another parable:  ^"For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, ⁴³ I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ ⁴⁴ Then they also will answer, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?’ ⁴⁵ Then he will answer them, saying, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me."--(Matthew 25:31-36).   We notice people by SEEING them. Really seeing the person--the blood--the wound--the need.  People in need matter and they matter as much as our mission statement; our mandates; our priorities and our every day "to do lists".
• Stopping-- if we are too busy to stop--then we are simply too busy. This is Jesus' point. We need to stop. It is not enough to see the need--our call is to actually stop and elp. In this parable, Jesus makes it clear that stopping is God's real will-God's real mission--God's real ministry.  When we are over-committed and spin rivaling priorities, we cannot stop--at least we live in the illusion that we can't stop. This is Jesus whole point for us to ponder. What is taking up the mental space and heart space that each one of us has in life?
• Reaching--Caring involves reaching out. Just as  you see  the person reaching to help---real help is incarnational. It involves our feet, our hands; our resources; our intent; our physical act---and not just our prayers.
• Helping--The Good Samaritan took the injured man to a place for healing and help.  Soul Care does not happen by thinking or even praying for help. It involves the actually help we extend to others. Our hands become God's extended hands. Our eyes become God's eyes to see. Our feet to move--become the incarnational feet of Jesus to move us to those in need. Teresa of Avila penned these famous words:Christ Has No BodyChrist has no body now on earth but yours, No hands but yours, No feet but yours, Yours are the eyes through which is to look out Christ’s compassion to the world; Yours are the feet with which he is to go about doing good; Yours are the hands with which he is to bless men now.T0 care like is to actually involves oneself in the incarnational work of God in the 21st century. This happens when we live this story out--when we put ourselves into this painting--when we believe the actual words Jesus offered us.
• Providing on-going care--this is the story of the actual Inn--the actual place where help is given. Care does not happen in a vacuum. Care happens in a place where love is extended; wounds are bound and stories are listened too deeply. Love is extended. This is the heart of God, is it not? The wounds are tended to; the man's story is listened to; good food and drink nourish the injured back to health.

When I study this picture as I have for several weeks now, I see that Van Gogh actually captured the mission of Potter's Inn. We care for the souls of leaders in the marketplace and ministry. This parable has shaped our important work.  We do this by providing care and by teaching the great preventative work involved in the care of our souls.We have an Inn. We provide a place for people from all over the world to come to learn; to experience care; to be equipped to be a mobile "Inn" in the  marketplace and ministry. We have people who care. We know how to provide the care leaders need and we are so deeply glad to be doing this great work. We are profoundly thankful to those of you who help us do this by your financial support and prayers. It takes a lot of help to do what we do.It's important for me to underscore that soul care, when really understood is NOT just like Red Cross kind of work--the kind of work done when catastrophes and storms wreak havoc. Soul Care is really preventative work--to equip people to know how to live well and work well in life. We do this by helping people understand the soul; how to care for the soul; how to live in a sense of rhythm and how to sustain the life God called us to live. 

Understanding Your Limits: Saying No In Order To Say Yes Grace for the Christmas Season

THE TRUTH SETS YOU FREEI love the words of Jesus when he told his followers “The truth will set you free.”[1] Freedom comes by embracing the truth, not by holding onto lies, illusions and myths.It’s interesting to note that the Apostle Paul wrote two different books to the same group of followers of Jesus in a city named Corinth in the Greek Isles. In the second book, we see an older, more mature Paul talk about living within limits. In 2 Corinthians 10:13, Paul explains his understanding of living life within the limits God has set for us. He writes about not over-extending ourselves.“But we will not boast beyond limits, but will boast only with regard to the area of influence God assigned to us, to reach even to you.  The Message puts it this way:“We aren’t making outrageous claims here. We’re sticking to the limits of what God has set for us.”A limit requires a basic understanding of where you should invest yourself and where you should refrain. A limit is understanding what writer Wendell Berry calls “your carrying capacity; knowing your own “bandwidth.” How much can you work? And not how long can you work, but how long SHOULD you work? And it’s not just about work. Limits are important to understand regarding most aspects of our lives. How much should we exercise, eat, sleep, play, use technology?   How much can you carry before something is dropped?Read the rest of Steve's article on the Conversations Journal site HERE...

Preparing for a New Beginning with a New Year

Most of the Biblical writers chose and wrote about an image that was easy to understand to help us fathom the spiritual life. The image of the potter working on the clay is a timeless and powerful description of our lives. The Bible is clear: We are the clay and God is the Potter. Over time and in time, the hands of the Potter work on our clay. This is the story of our spiritual formation.Yet, since we live in modern times and buy our mugs at one store and our bowls at another, we find it challenging to really grasp the meaning of this life-giving process. One aspect of a potter working on clay is appropriate for us to think through as we anticipate the coming of a New Year.The wheel of the potter goes around and around many times in the process of working on the bowl. Every turn is a new opportunity for the bowl to transform. It’s never just one turn or one experience or one touch of the Potter’s hands. There is never just one time or one chance or a single opportunity for the bowl to come out right. No, the wheel of the potter turns round and round—many times—to become the desired object.A New Year is a New Turn on the Potter's Wheel[tweetthis]Every New Year begins the opportunity for us to begin again. What didn’t work this past year now has the chance for transformation[/tweetthis]—our diet, job, a broken relationship, a wound inflicted by a friend, a event we thought was catastrophic—all has a new opportunity in the New Year. This is grace at work in each of us in that the New Year brings another turn of the Potter’s wheel to shape things right.As we prepare for the New Year, I wanted to offer five challenges that you may find helpful to implement.

1. Read only the “Red Letters of the Gospels.” At the lowest time in my life, I went to a monastery in California for a massive re-working of my clay pot-like life. There I met with Dallas Willard, a very popular author and teacher. I felt flat lined in my work. Gwen and I were very thin in our marriage and there was much inner upheaval happening in me. I wasn’t doing well. I wasn’t well. I felt dead spiritually. There, Dallas offered me words that changed my life. He said, “Steve, to come back to life, read only the red letters—the very words of Jesus—for an entire year. There, I bought a “red letter edition of the Bible”—which I still use today and began to just read the very words of Jesus.   In the New Year, make a commitment to “experiment” with this challenge and read only the Red Letters of Jesus. Stick in the Gospels and read his words, his stories and about his life. It will change you!  I tell about this life-changing conversation with Dallas Willard in The Lazarus Life (now available in Spanish, Portuguese, German, Danish, Norwegian and more!)

2. Choose to live in Rhythm. From the beginning of time, God has offered us a life-giving way to live. It is to foster a rhythm of life that we engage and then dis-engage. We work for six days. Then, we take a day to cease. The violation of rhythm is the number one reason why people’s lives are in such a state of disarray. We are over-commited and over-extended. Rhythm is the life giving answer for us. In the New Year, choose to cease technology; cease work; cease striving; cease email and voice mail; cease anything that drains you of life. On your Sabbath—do that which will bring you life: walk, hike, read a book, listen to music, worship, meet with life-giving friends for a Sabbath meal and enjoy.Life is fragile and we are such busy people. Sabbath becomes a gift that sustains our joy; insulates us from both outer and inner violence and allows us to thrive—not just survive.In the New Year, plan on living in rhythm and see what changes might happen in you and around you.  I recommend you read The Jesus Life to help you with this concept!

3. Invest in your life. Everyone who gives MUST be given to! We have so many hoses coming out of us which tend to fill up others around us. We want to fill our spouse. We want to fill our children. We want to fill our colleagues. We want to be responsible citizens. But where is the hose that comes into you which nourishes, feeds and pours life back into you? One of the great ways we can invest in our own life is by taking one day a month as a Personal Soul Care Day. Take one day a month and on that day—do what brings you life: Read a few chapters of a spiritual life giving book; Take a long walk. Sit in quiet and silence for one hour. Listen to some music or a podcast. Exercise rigoursly. Take a nap. Before you know it, the day is filled with all life giving activities. Further, plan on an extended retreat for a weekend or a few days. Take a look at what Potter’s Inn offers or your own church and invest yourself so that you can grow!

4. Take your body off the shelf and care for yourself.   For far too long, I put my body on “auto-pilot” believing that my body would simply serve me. But I was a hard task master on my body. I neglected the physical care I needed because I did not connect the dot in my heart and mind that body care is soul care. When I care for my body I am doing a very, important spiritual work. In the New Year make some easy-to-do commitments. Choose to walk every day. Choose to eat to live not live to eat. By changing our paradigms of how we look at health, we can really CHANGE ourselves; our outlook on life. Everything is connected and as we take the time to care for our bodies, we are really practicing the care of our own souls. The bottom line here is to choose every day to practice body care. I recommend your read my own awakening into this fascinating aspect of our lives by reading Soul Custody: Choosing to Care for the One and Only You.

5. Mark Your Time with Rituals. As modern, busy people, one of the effects of living so fast and swift is that all of our time is blurred. We have no markers that define sacred time, family time, work time and relationship time. Everything is blurred. We’re always on and always available. A simple ritual helps to mark time and avoids the collapse of time and space. A ritual is a simple visual "marking" that makes a space; a time; an event as very important---not just like all other times.
   • Mark one day a week as your Sabbath by the lighting of a candle.
   • Mark meal time as sacred time. Don’t talk about work. Light a candle and ask those you are sharing a meal with to share “What’s the beautiful thing that has happened in your day today and What is the brutal thing that has happened in your day.
   • Mark your calendar now for a day a month for the care of your soul. Prioritize this day above all others and don’t cheat yourself by living in the left-over time, simply taking bits and pieces of left-over time.
   • Mark time every day with your spouse or friend to practice what the ancients called the, “Daily Examen.” A simple 5 minute conversation where you review your day outloud looking for the fingerprints of God; looking at specific moments in your way where you experienced the God’s consolation and moments where you felt utterly abandoned (desolation). This simple exercise can help close the gap in a marriage and in working teams.
   • Mark a room or a chair as YOUR space to meet with God.  Set up a place in your home where you can go to be alone or have some quiet. Hang a picture. Place some objects on your desk that become a sort of portal for you to view deeper; into the heart of God.
     • I recommend that you read The Jesus Life as there is an entire chapter devoted to the topics of rituals.

If you're interested in a workbook/Bible study on the Potter and the clay--the process of spiritual formation, please consider Soul Shaping. It's ideal for individual and group use and is our go-to book to help people understand their story of formation and how a person really changes. This is ideal for a church wide or small group study in the New Year.Order Steve's books here through Potter's Inn and help support the ministry of Potter's Inn all around the world!  Here's our bookstore!